The Sex Factor

Chortle!So there we have it, it's all over. And Shayne won it. Which is good, but so did Louis Walsh, technically, which is bad. With a finale consisting of a closetted rent-boy, a singing binman and two depressingly average pub singers I think the only way there could have been a winner would have been if Simon Cowell had gone on a killing spree and taken every contestant's life. Then he'd kill Thornton. Then he'd kill Sharon and Louis. Then he'd kill Thornton again. Then he'd kill all of the 10 million who actually voted for a contest that, in the end, will have as much relevance to pop music as one of, oh let's say, Deuce (only nowhere near as good). Then he'd kill Thornton again by strangling her with her own hyperbolic attempts at creating tension.

I'd really like 'That's My Goal' to be good because Shayne might take his top off more. Unfortunately, it's not.