Men, Women & Children Review

I told you about Men, Women & Children a while back now (at the end of March). Then Zane Lowe jumped on the bandwagon. And now, they've released their eponymous debut album. But, is it any cop? Does it give me a reason to look smug until October? Let's find out...

The album kicks off in explosive style with the call of "I got a message! I think the moon is calling!" from 'Dance In My Blood' in a song with mixes the killer cool sound of the Killers with the anthemic vibes of the Arctic Monkeys ("we don't need a reason...") and the flare of Maximo Park. And the Panic! At The Disco emo-pop elements aren't concealing themselves very well. Plus, it's more of a dancefloor filler than 'Bet You look Good..' and 'Mr Brightside', give it time I promise you. Not bad for just one song, eh?

Tinny sounding 'Lightning Strikes Twice Of New York' sounds like Men, Women & Children are tiny mice trapped in a box in your brain scratching their way free with guitars. And the only way you can let them out is through dancing. And even if you do, this song will probably stay in your head anyway.

'Photosynthesis (We're Losing O2)' is, unfortunately, not about plants but in actual fact about living on the edge of life and not being afraid of getting hurt. Or possibly being in love with someone who's a bit nasty, though I'm sure the lyric "Come on let's hit it hard/Let's leave a mark" is supposed to be an inspiring thing.

Men, Women & Children go for the Best Song Title Award with a song called 'Who Found Mister Fabulous?'. I'm trying to find some meaning in this song, but it seems to be just a load of random sentences strung together, though I'm grasping it's about trying to find a different part to yourself, or something. Mid-way through there's a whistle-a-thon that sounds like Mr Fabulous was found in the Notting Hill Carnival.

'Messy' is a lot calmer, by which I mean it's flitting in one direction as opposed to flapping around like a fish. Which is unusual as it's about the sex. Perhaps the mellower sound hints that Men, Women & Children like it slow, and funky. Kinky sado-masochistic lyrics that Christina Aguilera would be proud of are found throughout. "We don't care if we get dirty/We ain't here for cleanliness".

Don't get intimidated by titles like 'At Night We Like To Fight'. Men, Women & Children are a bunch of softies really. They just like to mosh with a girl and bruise her up a bit before they take her from, and I don't think we should be worried. There's an odd trumpety bit at the end, which sounds like it's taken from an old film, just as the protagonists make the nasty. An anthem about moshing, surely invented for that sole purpose. In that case...

'Monkey Monkee Man' is, once again, about sex. This time they sing "Cause it's time to swing our sticks... Give me your right hand/Keep your left hand free... If we came form snails/Then let me see your trail" and the lyrics really speak for themselves. It's all very primitive. Neanderthal rock has never sounded so sophisticated as electro bleeps whizz and pop all across the place.

'Time For The Future (Bang Bang)' seems to be the first profound track on the album, one the first not written by the penis, though they do still get extended telescope references in there. Frontman, TJ Penzone sings of a girl from a future where "no-one believes in usless masquerades" so even it is about girls, it's sort of profound. In a way. Well, you've got to work with what's there.

I have a feeling 'The Name Of The Train Is The Hurricane' is about sex too with the chorus of "The Train leaves at dawn/Get off or get on" accompanied with rattlesnake analogies. Don't let the barrage of sexual references put you off though. All the time the record leaves you dancing like a robot from 1984. And despite it's lack of subtlety it comes out sexy rather than smutty. It shouldn't make you too uncomfortable. Honest.

We pick back up from the unadulterated smut-fest with '!Celebracion!' is more about lust than sex. Another fabuolous electro-indie-pop bonanza, but this time, with violins and strings and falsetto vocals. The nearest these guys could get to a ballad I feel.

'Sell Your Money' is the song that Math geeks make love to, and it's the most snarling song yet. The guitars, Penzone's vocals and keyboards all ache and moan throughout this song. The sexiness is much more subtle lyrically but has a moody, unforgiving, growling snarl that more than makes up for it.

'Sell Your Money' plays with numeracy, 'Photosynthesis' and 'Monkee Monkey Men' play with biology, so now it's time for a literacy lesson in 'Vowels'. I love anagrams in songs, and the chorus of "A E, I O U Nothing!" is just as fabulous, amazing and brilliant as you'd think it would be. A high pitched, fast paced, bitter end to an absolutely non-stop album that leaves me trying to ctach my breathe.

Basically, take the best band of 2004, the best album of 2005 and two of the best bands of 2006, put them all into a blender and extract the rubbishey bits (the Monkeys' hype, Panic! At The Disco's Fall Out Boy connections, La Park's melodrama, Brandon's pink jacket), add a big dollop of sex and you get this album. A must-have for all emo-kids, scenesters, indie boys and girls and popsters.

Allow me to be just a little smug...